So yeah… 7 years later

Well 7 years later. So much has happened that I was not able to keep up with this… maybe I can catch up now? I don’t know if I will try. My site had a lot of activity while I was gone… not sure why but that’s cool. I am debating if I should get back into this. Any thoughts from anyone out in cyber space?

Over a year

So I have been gone for a long time. I have been away from this blog almost a year. I really was working on my other blog because more people were aware of it. I am debating on erasing everything and starting over, continuing where I left off, or just out right deleting this account. I have to make another account for something else. Anyway I thought I would post something here to see how I felt about it. Peace out

It’s Not Easy

Ok so I have to tell a funny story. Sometimes in life things just crack me up. I find it so mind blowing how some people seem to get away with everything while other people can’t seem to get away with doing normal things without trouble.

For example an acquaintance of mine (to save their identity) got into her second car accident. Now unknowingly you might assume that this is the person who gets in trouble… but you would be wrong. Ok this is the second car accident my acquaintance has gotten into and has completely gotten away with. So here is the quick story. She was driving out to get some bread (seriously, I know) and while driving around the parking lot she ended up behind a motorcycle cop who had pulled someone over in front of her. So she waits a second and then decides to pass them. However she did not look and another car was coming out of one of the isle. So being quick in reflexes she tries to slam on the breaks………. however not being quick in accuracy (to say the least) she slammed on the gas instead. So she gases it into the truck’s passenger door. So both cars pull over and this acquaintance of mine comes out saying “I am so sorry I hit you.” The other driver’s vehicle was fine so they didn’t care too much but the driver wanted to switch information. Of course this acquaintance of mine doesn’t have their car insurance information or a pen or a pencil. Well eventually the cop comes over. Now this is the part of the story most people dread. HOWEVER for this acquaintance of mine the cop just kind pops his head in and says ‘ya’ll alright?’ and the OTHER DRIVER says that they are fine. And nobody is bothered that the acquaintance of mine is driving without proof of insurance or ownership. This acquaintance then goes home and tells her mother (who gave her the car) what had happen. . . . and nothing happens…. This is the second car accident this acquaintance of mine has gotten into and has a completely clean driving record… the series of sighs and comments I have exploding inside me I keep inside me incase this acquaintance reads this blog and takes it as me insulting them. I’m not… but if this person dies on the road I will feel bad for allowing them to drive.

Now let’s move on to the other person. This guy I know (me) decides he wants to take his friend to dinner because his friend has been helping him out. So this guy (me) finds about $15 in Subway Gift Cards. We go to Subway and before we even ordered I asked the employees if we could use the gift cards. After investigating my Gift Cards they inform me that they are totally valid and we can use them. We started ordering these 5 Dollar Sandwiches (which is a story in itself) and mine gets done first. As I am standing there at the end of the line getting ready to pay they decide that they are confused about my gift cards again. So I am standing their waiting and the cashier, who has completely read every word including the fine print, decides she wants to talk to the manager again. Once the cashier comes back she tells me that the sandwiches are going to be regular price. I inquire what exactly that meant since the price of the sandwich was five dollars. This cashier informs me that she is going to charge me like 6.11 for my sandwich even though it is clearly a $5 sandwich. I was already freaking out because if I was gonna pay that much for a sandwich I would have order a better sandwich. Astonished and starting to get shaken up that somebody is planning to stop my sandwich eating I ask her how much are our meals going to cost because we were making them combos. During this elongated pause of the cashier trying to calculate the incredible mathematical quandary of the price of two sandwiches and two drinks and chips, panic struck me and I said “well as long as it’s under $15 I guess it doesn’t really matter.” And I kid you not the cashier turns to me and says “it’s going to be 16.20.” Again my mind is completely blown wondering how two 5 dollar sandwiches, two drinks, and chips turned into 16 bucks! Now my buddy offered to pay and I’m like screw that I’ll walk away from these sandwiches before I pay for them. Eventually to make this long story slightly shorter the manager comes over and both the cashier and the manager gets into an all out brawl with the cash register only to be on par with two great Aikido Masters. Somehow by the direct hand of God they figure it out and I actually get some change back. I think I ended up getting like twenty-two cents but that’s twenty-two cents I didn’t have! It was a long story and I did end up coming out on top… but of course I can’t just got to a store with gift cards without making an issue.

This was all summed up when my buddy looks over to me as we walk out and says “I can’t take you anywhere.”

Deobjectification

My fiancé is so special. I love her so much. She has such amazing qualities. She is so brilliant and sweet and everything. One of the things I like about her is that she is a very girly girl. I learn a lot about women though her. It is like a gateway into another universe. I mean she really is a girly girl. What I mean by that is that we have flowers and butterflies on everything! Even above my head as a type right now is a painting of flowers. We have flowers on picture frames and pillows and everything. And if there isn’t a flower, there is a butterfly, and I don’t mean one… I mean many. I suppose it’s not technically on everything… yet… but I have confidence in her flowering up abilities.

“Flowering Up” is an ability many girls receive at birth. See as a guy I have to figure these things out and share them with future guys. This is to help them out, although the future of males is a grim future. In our own time Man Law is disregarded. There are many factors to why this happens but never the less it happens. But I digress. Another ability I’d like to share with the remnants of men is the ability I have classified as “Deobjectification”. This is a term I made up to explain this… thing… girls do. It’s so interesting I had to name it. Girls often do this … thing … where they have items that are just for show. Now I don’t mean they have these items on display nor are these display-like items. Girls take ordinary objects and make it so you can’t use them.

For example, I have pillows on my bed. That seems fine and dandy except I have pillows on my bed not meant for sleeping on. In a matter of fact I am suppose to take the pillows off the bed when I go to sleep. More interesting yet, when I wake up in the morning…. I am supposed to put those very same pillows back on the bed. Get that! So they took the object and removed its purpose. “Deobjectification”

Another example, there are towels in the bathroom. Fine enough, yet I am not allowed to use those towels in the bathroom. These towels are sort of just for looking at. There is no story behind these towels, they could have been chosen at random. There is nothing special about these towels except perhaps some color pattern to the other non-touchable or deobjectified towels around them. I remember once when I got in trouble at my aunt’s house for using soap… that was not for using. I did not learn the secret of deobjectification yet.

After awhile of deobjectification it becomes a very nervous place. All over the house things become purposeless…. candles you can’t light, cushions you can’t sit on, dishes you dare not use, until one day when you are required to sit on plastic protected couches and chairs or you have to put little plastic booties of your shoes as you walk on the floor.

But I am not there yet. Neither is my bride to be. She allows me my space. I have a picture of a hand-sketched sniper scene a friend gave me on the wall. Also a picture of a Never Never Land story my brother bought me many years ago is on the wall with a dwarf smoking a pipe poster giving to me by my cousin. I even hear rumors that some of my medieval weaponry may find a place to be mounted on the wall. My fiancé is sweet and way too kind to me. And I love her.

The Table

Ok so this is a funny story. I love my new family so much. They’re so kind and giving. It’s interesting how things work out. We come front very different backgrounds and sometimes when we’re (me and them) try to collectively figure things out we are so different in our approach. Sometimes (most time) they have a really good approach and it takes a few seconds (sometimes a longer time) for me to catch on and vice versa. But one of the things I love the most is that we’re honest and deal with the differences in a very friendly way.

The other day my fabulous fiancé was on craigslist.com (a website that all women seem to believe in) and order this awesome table. This started a debate, between my fiancé and her grandmother, whether the table was too big to fit in the room it was going into. So my fiancé and her grandmother started debating the length of this and that. This eventually led to the three of us standing around in a triangle-circle situation trying to guesstimate the size of the table. During this process I am trying not to laugh because the three of us are standing around holding hands trying to guess the size of our circle-triangle to guess the size the table might be to guess if it will fit in a room we also don’t know the size of… and to make it worst they are debating on it. I am dying trying not to laugh.

Well this led to a worst situation. The actual pick up of the table. I got my buddy Corey to come with me and we went to pick up the table. This was all bad. It was so bad I must just jump to the loading side of the story because during the driving part we must have went the wrong way 7 times (for funny reasons), cut off a cop (twice…the same cop), walked to up to the wrong house because their garage was open and then scared them a bit, just to get to the table. Once we finally got to this house the people were really nice. The table looked slightly different than the picture but it looked good. Oh one side note on the people that was interesting. When we got there they were going through baby clothes (they had three really young boys) but all the baby clothes were girl clothes… and they had a lot of it. Oh and of course Corey and I bring these sheets to cover the glass and it would have pictures of naked cartoon people laughing.

Anyway Corey and I get this table outside and we’re trying to figure out the best way to get this thing in his truck. We came up with and tried some of the worst methods possible. One method (which was the funniest) involved us leaning a huge glass table top against the cabin of the truck and rope coming in through our windows and me holding it tight. It was like a sleigh right but backwards. We did that for a few feet until I decided the freeway would throw the glass out. After a few shuffling and re-tying we got it moving, which again we got lost another time.

The table is in the room and it did fit. It’s an awesome table and my wonderful lady makes it look nice. It was just kinda funny.